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Photo by Ethan Hoover on Unsplash

Reflections of a Lone Achiever

Is a success a success if you don’t have someone with whom to share it? It absolutely is!

Yet I still seek my soul mate with whom to share life’s highs and lows. As I accomplish more and more in my life, it can feel lonely to achieve. The nonexistent support during my effort and lack of recognition once I’ve completed a challenge successfully haunts me.

After my recent breakup with my boyfriend, I had a presentation to give. I’d been excited about being asked and felt confident in myself to do an excellent job. And I did. But right afterward, I felt that nagging emptiness. Yes I had accomplished. Yes I’d impacted others. …

How I zeroed in on my New Home in France

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When I told my friend Bea that I had moved from Perpignan to Céret after only a year there, she remarked with surprise, “Oh really, do you think you’ll stay there long?”

I could sense confusion and a bit of judgment in her tone. After all I’d just picked up and moved from Richmond, Virginia in the United States to Perpignan in the South of France only a year earlier, and now I was on the move again.

Certainly, it was another change, but I had gained clarity about where in France I would be even happier. And I had done what was right for me. …

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Photo by Victória Kubiaki on Unsplash

You Might Just Find the Fountain of Youth

“The Fountain of Youth is Closer than You Think.” That is the title of a chapter I wrote for the ABCs of Awesome Living, a book project in which I took part. And the fact that the publisher will release it in the next few days is no coincidence. Recent events have convinced me of it!

I’ve been following the same route for my morning walk for over a year now, but I took a slight detour down a street with no outlet on Sunday. Usually, when I see a road with a dead-end sign, I avoid going down it, because…well, what’s the point? I don’t want to waste time and have to backtrack. …

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Photo by Daniel Sandvik on Unsplash

You Just Might Build Skills that will Come In Handy Later

I recently gave a presentation to a group of college alumnae. A college representative had asked me to speak on November 21, and I’d been honored.

Though I’d had five weeks to prepare, I waited until the last minute (or what seems like the last minute to my old self) to start to prepare. On November 15, I got serious, figured out the structure of my presentation, and began writing my speech. By 17th, I was content with what I’d created and I had the 15-minute introduction memorized. By November 20, a full day before my talk, I felt fully prepared. No nerves, no concerns. …

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Then Ask Yourself this Question!

Every society (and family) has a set of rules that help guide it, which helps keep order and the status quo. We are born into our culture without choice, and our brains are imprinted with the cultural norms (rules and regulations) without our choice either, when we are young.

I was born into a family with the guiding principle of “A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.” Meaning you do everything to keep what you have and maintain the status quo. This was meant to protect us by playing it safe. You don’t quit a job unless you already have one in hand. Working for someone else at a job with benefits is better than trying to build something on your own. …

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Photo by David Kovalenko on Unsplash

And How You can Improve your Track Record

We don’t reach our goals because sometimes the goals we set are not important to us. We think we want to do something for some external factor, but the reasons don’t tap into our core values. I spoke of this in last week’s message.

But in my article entitled Is a Lack of Motivation Derailing your Dreams? I shared with you how to avoid or navigate this pitfall when it comes to having the success you want in life by leveraging How #2 to have Copious Success: Set a Meaningful Goal.

And sometimes, the reason we don’t reach our goals is that we don’t believe in ourselves. We don’t have the confidence that we have the skills or can develop them to achieve what we desire. This lack of confidence kills many dreams, keeps people stuck, and leaves them feeling regret for what they wish they had done or even attempted to do.

I’ve shared with you How #1 to have Copious Success: Build Self-confidence in Want More Wins in Your Life? Start here.” While it might take a little time to develop this muscle, you can do it.

However, even when we’ve set a meaningful goal and we’ve built our self-confidence, our dreams can remain out of reach. Why is that?

I had the dream to move to France back in 2014. I’d never even been there, but something about the country, the culture, and the language spoke to me. So in 2015, I visited for the first time, and I wasn’t disappointed. I saw myself living in this beautiful country. …

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Then turn to Your Core, Core Values that is!

When you set a goal do you lack the belief in yourself to attain it? Sometimes I do. I mentioned this in my story “Want More Wins in Your Life? Start here!” which led me to discuss the “Building Self-confidence” Catalyst for Cultivating Courage.

But “Setting a Meaningful Goal” is a Catalyst for Cultivating Courage all by itself.

“Setting a Meaningful Goal” is easy to say. But it can be challenging to define goals that are meaningful. That is to say, that they pack the necessary motivation to get you into action and keep you there. …

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Photo by engin akyurt on Unsplash

“How #1" to have Copious Success

I recently promised to share my secret to having copious success with my subscribers. But as I sat down to document it, I wasn’t sure where to start.

Which hard-won accomplishment should I dissect to show you my process?

But then I realized that the answer doesn’t lie in dissecting the accomplishments; it comes from looking back to them.

When I set a goal sometimes I lack the belief in myself to pull it off. I’m no different from you. Shadowy thoughts of self-doubt and failure creep into my mind. …

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Photo by Sašo Tušar on Unsplash

When I first moved to France, I lived in a stinky apartment. It smelled of sewer gas. I only lived there for one week, because it was unbearable for me. I was able to get out of my contract with a certificate from the doctor.

Disaster averted. But this incident was not without consequence.

The issue arose when I had to decide where I would live for the rest of the year. I was in an unfamiliar environment, and everything swirled around me like a tornado. I’d just moved from the United States to France, and my emotions were all over the place, excitement, anxiety, pride, and of course, fear. I didn’t know anyone. My lodging, which I’d secured for a year, had fallen through. And, while I spoke and understood French reasonably well at that point, being out of my element made it difficult for me to think clearly and communicate effectively. I was in a foreign country all by myself, and my apartment was uninhabitable. …

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Self-sabotage makes us feel like we are in control of our lives. It’s a preemptive strike to the disappointments, heartache, or pain we think we are doomed to experience. So instead of waiting to see how the circumstance will play out, we act before the devastation can materialize, thus giving the semblance of controlling the situation.

The problem with this tactic is that it can create situations that don’t serve our own self-interests and are more difficult for us in the long run. This approach, destroying something before it has a chance to potentially destroy you, might feel like a safe option, but it disempowers you. It destroys your hope for the future, depleting your energy. …


Patricia Brooks

Bold, fledgling entrepreneur, author, podcast host Discovering Courage, Finding Freedom, Living in France! Adventures.Insights. Stories.

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